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Ron Updyke: "It was horrible. Horrible."
Tony Vincenzo: "Have you got any background on the murdered girl, Ron?"
Ron Updyke: "She's dead. Throat cut. Her head was nearly severed from her body."
Carl Kolchak: "You get that from the coroner's report?"
Ron Updyke: "I got it from a reporter from The Herald. He actually saw the body."
Tony Vincenzo: "He saw the body? Well, what did you do, Ron?"
Ron Updyke: "Well, I went to where she was... murdered. It was..."
Carl Kolchak: "Horrible?"
Ron Updyke: "Exactly."
From Episode: The Ripper
| Submitted By Tom G.
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(Discussing fellow reporter Ron Updyke)
Tony Vincenzo: "Well, let him do his own research!"
Carl Kolchak: "He can't. He's a bibliophiliac."
Tony: "Huh?"
Carl: "He's uh... persona non grata down at the library."
Tony: "He's what?"
Carl: "Yeah. You see see he takes books out. He's got half the books in the library out and they're all overdue. As a matter of fact, they've got a warrant out for his arrest."
Tony: "Well, that's not like Ron."
Carl: "Oh, I know. I know uh... I was terribly disturbed about it when I heard it. I don't know - It must be some sort of deep-seated illness, a compulsion of sorts I gather. Biblio... philiac."
Tony: "Biblio?"
Carl: "Yeah."
From Episode: The Ripper
| Submitted By Tom G.
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(discussing various Ripper murders spanning decades)
Carl Kolchak: "All of these guys operate exactly the same way... almost as if they were the same man."
Jane Plumm: "That would make him older than your suit and that is saying a lot."
From Episode: The Ripper
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Police Detective Susan Cortazzo: "Are you a tennis player?"
Carl Kolchak: "Uh, what? No. No. Why?"
Masseuse: "Because your shoes are so funny."
Carl Kolchak: "I run a lot."
From Episode: The Ripper
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Carl Kolchak (being led away in handcuffs): "Wait! Wait! Where's Phil? Where's Phil? Phil knows I'm innocent! Listen, I don't like to watch girls!"
Police Officer: "You don't like to watch girls?"
Carl: "No, I don't... no and I'm not that way either!"
From Episode: The Ripper
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(after walking into a Ripper crime scene)
Ron Updyke: "Oh... Oh. Where's the men's room?"
(Ron flees to presumably vomit)
-Ron Uptight Updyke
From Episode: The Ripper
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Ron Updyke: "Mr. Vincenzo, what's wrong with my story?"
Tony Vincenzo: "It reads like an expose on the massage parlor, Ron!"
From Episode: The Ripper
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"May 21st, 3:00am, across the state line at Werner's Boom-Boom Room in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Michelle Schiffler, dancer, whatever, had just done her last number. I mean, really her last number."
-Carl Kolchak
From Episode: The Ripper
| Submitted By Tom G.
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"May 24th, 11:30pm, three days later, Milwaukee. Again. Debbie Fielder, 22, 5' 9", weight 120, hobbies, breaking horses and collecting bone china. Debbie wanted to be successful. She should have settled for being alive."
-Carl Kolchak
From Episode: The Ripper
| Submitted By Tom G.
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"May 29th, 11:00pm, the Loop – Chicago's answer to Times Square - miles of neon, crowds, excitement, and the usual big city tourist traps. And that night, a very unusual tourist."
-Carl Kolchak
From Episode: The Ripper
| Submitted By Tom G.
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